It's 3:15am and I haven't slept at all yet.
I couldn't sleep and conveniently neither could Elwood. He's been up every hour or so wanting to be held and poor thing has a cold that he's fighting and he just doesn't feel well.
So I finally get frustrated that I can't sleep so I come downstairs and do the dishes. Yes, at 3am I'm downstairs scrubbing pots and pans and loading the dishwasher. And as I'm doing this, Elwood is crying upstairs. I run up and grab him and we rock.
We rocked in his room and the closer I held him, the more calm he got. For about fifteen minutes he just stared at me. He used his hands to feel my face and look in my eyes. *This one of those mama moments you never forget.
After about thirty minutes he finally gives in and lays his head on my chest. And I hum a lullaby until he falls asleep. But as I hum I can't help but get teary eyed just looking at my beautiful son who sweetly needs his mama tonight for reasons I can only guess.
I crept downstairs and decided I was going to catch up on my reading and blogs that I follow. Tammie Head is an amazing woman of God that has written a bible study and speaks around the country. I read her blog often and tonight I sat down to read her latest post (found here).
Can Jesus handle your pain? Tammie answers absolutely.
I love the point she makes that the modern church tends to glaze over pain and tell us that Jesus conquers it and that we can live victoriously in Him. (Which is true!)
But then she says what I know God really means --
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” -Matthew 11:28-30
Crawl into the lap of Jesus and let Him LOVE you to life. What sweet words from our Savior. He desires to love us deeply, not just skip all the details. He wants to know everything. He wants to heal every part of us.
This encouraged me so much as a reminder that as I rocked my son who I love more than I can even describe in the middle of the night; Jesus desires to do the same with my soul.
So I'm downstairs with a cup of hot tea at 3:30am letting the Lord love on me.
Let Him love you to life. What a sweet, precious, intimate, and holy God I love that will sit and be with me.
Tonight I'm thankful.